De-escalation (Day 574)

It is unavoidable that there will be heated moments when we are about to lose it. Maybe it's because of unfairness, or because of ego gets hurt or various other reasons.

It is easy to act out in a way that we may regret later, especially when hot-headed. If we act out, we may provoke the counterparty more and escalate the seriousness of the conflict.

I was guilty of this more frequently when I was younger. I was more impulsive and quick to jump to conclusions.

Maybe it's aging or the readings from Stoicism. I try not to let my frustration show. Especially in a leadership position, our role is to take in the shits so our colleagues can perform their best.

But what happens when one colleague is angry with another?

Seneca said that delay was the best remedy for anger. Perspective, as Calhoun said, is a close second. --Daily Stoic newsletter by Ryan Holiday

My advice will always be: "give it time!" Calm down comes with time. Take a break before responding; sleep overnight before sending a curt message.

But what if it's in a meeting? As the quote above says, perspective helps. Before getting personal, try to understand the context and where the anger comes from. Giving things a perspective would allow more empathy. Processes won't work unless people buy into them.

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