Feedback needed: landing page for cold traffic
Spent the weekend working on a landing page about our product with the intent to provide more context about the people behind the company and the benefits of our products.
Here is the page What would you change?
The landing page is targeted towards "cold traffic" from a Facebook Ads campaign, using lookalike audiences based on website visitors (US), and another ad set of lookalike audiences of people that engaged with the Facebook page (also US) of the business.
It feels a bit messy, I'm not sure what you are trying to tell me. Are you selling me on the brand, your history, or a shirt?
Maybe move the testimonial of the CEO higher or even on the header of the page, as it makes the reader identify with the target group. A dress shirt that "creates time" is a conclusion that the reader should make themselves with some different wording. My first thought was "I doubt that", not a great way to start.
The picture of you guys makes it more personal, but the picture itself is a big mistake. Why aren't you wearing the product?? And one of you is closed off with headphones and phone in hand, he might as well lean back and fold his arms closed.
Thanks a lot, Peter! This really helps!
First impresions were:
What the heck am I looking at ?
ohh... it's a shirt, but why do I have to guess ?
ok, how it works ?
VLOG entries... lame - It's not a celebrity or some famous journalist, right ?
Why do I need a 15% discount popup on a product that I don't really understand ?
Why theres a vlog entry of a bald dude working out in a post-soviet gym ?
Well, I suppose, your target audience would be wemen, so UX should be tuned accordingly. I personally don't buy a lot of shirts, like 4-5 in a year max, but most of the good stuff I'm usually getting from my wife as a gift - that's just my way of thinking... Some companies built their AD stuff arout that idea, but targetting wemen is hard.
Context highlights are way off: I really don't get the benefits of a product which costs almost 100 euros and why should I pay for it.
UX, in general, is in bad shape: there are no highlights, bits of informational noice here and there...
Using a generic shopify template is simply not enough nowadays to attract customers.
Get some images which show off the structure and uniqueness of the shirt's material. Show that you've used the best materials out there, where they've been produced, with great care, greenish stuff for hipsters/vegans etc.
Icebreaker, for instance, allow their customers to track the exact farm where the wool had been produced for every single unit via special ID label.
It would be great if you would've used some paralax effect with bits of animations showing off the layers of cloth and the fibers weaving... that would've been cool. Sometimes I think that I'm into Ruiner's landing paralax way too much :D
Thanks a lot, Yuriy! Good stuff :) Actually, our targeting is towards men, but you make a good point that women are often the ones buying shirts for their boyfriends/husbands.
Man, getting a good landing page is hard :D
Thanks!
A few things you can consider
As always, take this feedback with a pinch of salt.
PS: I love the simplicity of your brand name :)
Keep rocking.
PPS: I have some feedback on your reviews page as well, let me know if you want me to share it.
Hi Natwar,
Thank you so much for taking the time and reviewing the page! I would love to hear your feedback on the reviews page :)
Those points you raise are quite valid. We have started to address them one by one. It is fun to see how things improve with this type of crowdsourced knowledge :)
Thank you!
You are most welcome Marin.
Couple of things from reviews page:
Not sure if it happened with you but reviews page for 2nd best converting page for my last SAAS startup (after pricing page)
Hope this helps.
This is great! Thanks!
The reviews page is not really attracting much attention at the moment yet :)
Hi Marin! Nice solid site. I like it! As other have mentioned I would show more of your product (images) and underline your advantages. (I was looking at mobile version.)
Also I'm not sure about your headline - creates time? - why not something in context with superb material you don't have to iron and still look great (not an english speaker so I can't really tell).
Btw: coud you explain on how you handle payments?
Thanks & good luck!
Hey, thanks a lot for the feedback! I agree about the product images. Actually, this page shows one of our weaknesses at this time - good product photography. So far we have only done it ourselves. Now, we are working on organizing a proper photo shoot to fix this :)
As for the headline - also a good point. It's what we've been struggling with a bit to define - do we talk about the advantages of wearing DULO, or do we talk about the properties. The feedback so far from the community here seems to be to talk about the properties more.
As for payments - we use Shopify and our payment processors are PayPal and a local vendor here for the Netherlands.
Thanks for dropping your comment! Let me know if I can help with anything :)
When targeting cold traffic (whether from FB, Google, IG, whatever) you need to make sure your message is laser sharp.
Are you super clear about who you want to buy this product? I see a testimonial from Ryan Carson. Most people in this community know who he is. Put more time into segmenting that potential set of customers, find out how they speak (especially in relation to clothing), what motivates them, where they shop, etc. Try to use their language in your copy so that it resonates directly with them.
I have to say that I disagree with one of the comments about leading with your story. Don't lead with your story. Your customer is the hero, not you. Why should anyone care about your story when buying a shirt? Your story isn't going to give anyone a better shirt wearing experience.
I agree about the photos. You're selling clothing here. The photos MUST be absolutely top quality, no compromises whatsoever. I've spent a long time helping fashion brands & retailers sell more and this is one of the top 5 most important aspects of succeeding.
I suggest reading Storybrand by Donald Miller. Once you've done that, the entire experience of writing will be much simpler.
If you're still struggling, let me know, i'd be more than happy to give you some more advice.
Good luck! I love the idea!
Hi Joseph! This is super helpful! Thank you!
After making the page, I realised that indeed - the message is a bit all over the place. Also, I agree 100% about being laser sharp - it has been one of our biggest challenges to tackle. We know in our heads what we want to say, but somehow it always ends up slightly on the side of what we wanted. I guess not being native speakers could be playing a part here as well.
Thank you for the book recommendation! I will check it out. Yesterday, I read an article about how consumers are tired of sifting through all the narratives brands are trying to push to differentiate themselves. It leads to consumer fatigue and a rise in "brandless" brands - with very simple and direct packaging and message. It fits well with your comment about leading with the story.
Also, addressing the photos issue. So far, we have only done it ourselves but we know it always leads to mediocre results. That's why we are now organising a professional shoot :)
Thanks a lot once again!
P.S. You are working on some pretty cool stuff with Pilotfish. Would you be interested in being a guest on our podcast The Early Days to talk about your journey? :)
Hey Marin,
That's all my pleasure.
Haha, thanks. Pilotfish is moving along nicely after a few difficult months.
I would absolutely love to be on your podcast. My email address is joseph@pilotfish.io - please email me with the information you need to get it set up.
Awesome! I will email you with details shortly :)
Since it's a physical product and fashion, you want to focus on two things:
So that means lots of images. I'd suggest taking a look at the mobile view as well as this displays how much imagery is lacking. Consider also finding more succinct ways of expressing what you're trying to say. Shorter, fewer text and bigger, beautiful images will help sell it for you.
Good luck :)
Thank you very much, Sarwech!
I agree 1000% with you about it. It seems to be the biggest issue we have with our website in general. We are now addressing it and working on organising a professional shoot, because so far - it has been just us doing the photography :)
Thanks!
Exactly, I think investing in a professional shoot is a good idea for this type of product and gives you a better chance of succeeding.
I think the page is perfect, I wouldn't change a thing. But if I had to pick, maybe you should all links to those hot-keywords across the top of the page so customers can read more info about those perks.
Cheers, Abraham! Makes sense to provide more details about the properties 🙂 Thanks!
In general a nice solid website, but actually I think that this initial picture is too big and distract people from the forward-looking advantaged of a brand ( non-iron etc.) . At first glance is not clear what i am going to buy, but it should be so.
And as for advantages, do something like "Why we're awesome". And highlight it. As for what clients say, make it more personalized, use photos..customers will see who has bought this great shirt, they are successful and they will want to look like he
And apart from this, it looks like a great product
Thanks, John! Will add your recommendations to the list of improvements :) Helps a lot!
Wouldnt influencers be a better bet than Facebook traffic?
We've been working with influencers as well, Shaun. This is just an experiment for ads only activation - just getting comfortable with the whole workflow of building funnels.