"Are you mad bro?"
Anyone else ever get insanely tilted (frustrated, annoyed, angry) when confronted with a series of difficult issues/bugs/problems that they just have to completely stop and cool off for a bit?
Anyone else ever get insanely tilted (frustrated, annoyed, angry) when confronted with a series of difficult issues/bugs/problems that they just have to completely stop and cool off for a bit?
Yup, I'm mad, but mostly at myself for making the wrong decision in life.
There were several junctures in my life where, if I had selected the other branch on my decision tree, my life would have been radically different now.
Then again, hindsight is of course 20/20, it's not like I made those decisions lightly/recklessly, but it still pains me to know that the opportunity was right in front of me and I just picked the wrong choice. Most don't even get that opportunity in front of them.
That said, my life is still pretty great all things considered, but it would have been magnificent had I just made those 1/2 choices correctly.
This hits me really hard because my girlfriend and I just separated and it maybe one of the greatest or worse decisions.
I'll spare you the details but I agree with you that there are MASSIVELY important decision branches in life. It can be impossible to know in the moment so we cannot beat ourselves up about it outside of learning from the experience.
We must forgive ourselves and push into the future always.
For sure! Anger can be a beautiful thing. It is a part of our evolutionary make up. It gives us the energy to either move away from something or move through it.
Anger often gets a really bad wrap. I think that's because people misuse it and mistreat people with it. But if you harness it and express it in a wholesome way, it is super helpful.
That is so true.
I feel the same way about fear.
Just like anger, your fear can be a MAJOR source of direction to prevent or overcome the obstacles ahead.
Totally - great point!
Trying to stay very calm but at the end of the day I'm human and saying that I wouldn't be upset once in a while is a lie.
I think it's fine to blow off steam sometimes but as it usually doesn't accomplish anything you should move on quickly.
I agree with you 100%.
The big problem is that anger literally does nothing for us. In fact it makes things worse.
For me the key is practicing blowing off steam quickly in productive ways so I can get back to solving the problem.
Yeah, I can definitely relate. My go-to tends to be to speak to someone who isn't familiar with this world at all and thinks my frustrations are ridiculous...a harsh but efficient way to gain perspective haha. I'm curious, how do people 'let off steam' and calm back down when this happens? Because, at least I, find it really difficult to focus once I'm frustrated - I can't just keep working on the task, my efforts are irrelevant.
I feel you here. Communicating with others that aren't in your domain can be challenging.
When I go past a certain point (full tilt) I need to literally stop what I'm doing (usually coding) and lay down or go for a walk or do some deep breathing.
That's how I 'let off steam' in the short term.
Oh wow, I didn't expect these results. I voted "Never". I genuinely can't remember the last time a problem with my company or product made me angry.
It's hard to get traction. Products are never perfect. It's okay if some ideas don't pan out. Things aren't always easy. But I think this is a reality you just gotta embrace.
As someone once said, you don't do those things because they're easy. But because they're hard. Where would the fun be otherwise?
For me, it’s all about perspective.
The ones that really get me are when significant issues pop up that could have been prevented by following standards/best practices. This recently happened to me with a 3rd party tool and I fumed all weekend.
In most cases, I’ve found that bugs come with the territory. So, keep a level head and you’ll get through it easier.
You're so right. I literally wrote this post because I also fumed hard by under estimating the difficulty of a feature.
After I cooled off i realized all the issues came with the territory just like you said. Had a kept a level head I would have been more patient and built the feature faster.
It was a good wake up call - the week has been going much better.
Wow, I'm super surprised more of y'all didn't answer, "I'm titled literally everyday". I'm constantly getting merked by code.
The way I get through it is following my old teacher, "take it one line at a time. If the code isn't doing what you expected, don't go on." This helps me immensely tackle things in an incremental way.
I am not mad, just sick of my IH SaaS products failing even after some receiving decent upvotes on Product Hunt.
List of projects that are failing and shut down:
Lasted December 2020 through August 2021
Lasted May 2021 through March 2022 after launch on AppSumo
Lasted September 2021 through November 2021
Renamed to look less like Ass
That's rough man. I experienced a similar thing with Light Bulb.
My current issue is finding my super niche audience (creative musicians) and improving retention.
At the end of the day we have to remember: every failure is a lesson.
It's just your brain telling you to stop. I found that acceptence works here, consistently reminding myself that I should accept (that I'm mad) and that makes me less mad interestingly enough. Google: "Acceptance theory". Also CBT and the book Feeling Good should help (it helped me immensely in many situations).