Feedback on My Landing Page
Hi, I'm starting my first product, and here's its landing page: https://focuspocusapp.com/.
Can you help me out by giving some feedback on the aesthetics and copy writing?
Thanks! This is my first landing page, so I really appreciate the feedback.
How can a focus app turn out to be so distracting? I don't really understand what the app does. It just keeps distracting me with flashing things that I don't understand.
Yeah I get that haha. Do you think it's all the videos next to each other, or the speed, or that it's videos not screenshots that makes it feel like that?
Thanks for the feedback :)
I felt like it's a combination of those to some extent, but on the second try to understand it, I think I now understand what the app does. Perhaps it needs a small tweak to help people understand it clearly in the first few seconds.
Hey, I made some changes. Is it more clear now? I'd really appreciate if you can take another look.
It feels a little empty to me. Maybe you could try adding more copy - describe what advantage there is to each step. Why should I add tags? Why is the countdown timer so simple? To eliminate distractions? Why should I use this app in particular?
Hey, thanks for your initial feedback :) I made some improvements based on your comments if you can take another look
Hm yeah, you're right. Thanks :)
I'll ping back when I have the chance to make some updates.
Hey, please consider adding your product to IH. Much easier for us to see your timeline, growth path.. how you tracking. Good, bad and ugly. it is what we are here for -- to help.
EDIT:
LP: fm it is way off. So let me try to explain the experience I had. It is not good sorry.
From a human potential perspective, the key thing with time management is -- the effort (and time) to undertake time management, must be soo frictionless, it is done. Otherwise the person is caught up in the loop of doing yet another distracting activity.
From a human potential perspective, focus appears in a number of ways. Being uninspired by something is often confused with lack of focus. You cannot force one-self to be inspired. Cannot fake it til you make it. So be honest with self, is the root cause a focus issue or a lack of inspiration/belief about the xxx
Tactics to improve focus:
etc..
You're right. Thanks for the reminder. Been meaning to
Over the fold area doesn't really tell me what the product is. "Hocus Pocus" by itself sounds like it might be magic trick related. Having the text "Hocus Pocus" in white font over light background gradient is not great of readability, the contrast isn't very good.
Trying to follow what is going on on those two side by side animated mobile device screens is rather difficult. You should display screen captures like this one by one, not multiple at the same time.
The page doesn't describe the product at all. What is it, what are its features, and so on. I don't even know whether this is a mobile app or a SaaS.
This needs a lot more work.
Thanks again for your initial feedback. I made some edits if you have time for another look
I feel like you are still wasting a lot of prime real estate over the fold. Your only pitch OTF is "try this product" and "sign up". While these are important, I would really consider adding some information over the fold about what this product really is. So user can decide without scrolling, whether this is for them.
Other than this, the page is now looking better.
I would also add a footer area with copyright, company name and links to privacy policy and terms of service. Even if you are just starting up, having these is good practice. Many people would be very skeptical about a website without a privacy policy for example.
Oh I see what you mean now. Thanks! I'll make some more updates
Thanks!
Yeah wow, definitely agree with all that. I'll get back when I have some updates.
i think that is pretty good, the image is and animation tells me everything that it does.
It is interesting as I use something similar as a pomodoro technique and vitamin-r.
I think its alright in terms of the visuals.
But you need to work on the heading and hero explanation.
who are yuo targeting and how much does it cost?
this is my landing page:
https://www.indiehackers.com/post/landing-page-feedback-notifystream-61ca5806e7
Awesome thanks! I’ve updated the page if you want to take another look.
Not sure on pricing. If I can figure out distribution before launching on iOS, probably 8/mo. If I can’t probably freemium.
You use a similar app? I’d love to hear more about what your current productivity practices look like.