How do you motivate co-founders to commit with you on an idea?
Working on a dev tool that is about to launch to the whole waitlist. MVP has been doing really well, lots of data points and clarity on what to do next.
The trouble is I feel like my cofounder is not committed. He promises stuff but then doesn't deliver. I also think he isn't excited about this project as much as I am and he doesn't see the potential. The challenge is I have a day job and he doesn't, so the time doesn't seem like an explanation here.
Given we are still in the early stages, I want to act as soon as possible. How would you motive your cofounder in this case? Or what else would you do at this stage?
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If you have to motivate your co founder, maybe they shouldnt be your co founder. Organic interest is the best. Your cofounder is probably like family.
Agreed
I was aBout to say this. Word
Agreed, Raiyan. I'm trying to understand how to work it out (+ whether my assumptions above are true) before a potential parting.
Your assumptions are probably accurate. The biggest catch is the fact that you think he is not excited. This might be bad for your morale. Again your co founder might be going through things as well. Have an honest discussion. Use a paid service or product and divide the bill, this make things serious and pushes things forward.
Thanks, Raiyan! One quick question: what paid service do you mean? Feel free to give a bit of context as it will be super helpful!
I meant using a paid developer tool or something like that. For example lets say you use a website builder or buy an icon or pay for hosting. If a person is not interested in building something he wouldnt pay for these tools. It also helps you understand that maintaining and running a company / product involes a bit of money. One of my friends didnt want to work with me on a project after he found out that we would probably have to pay 30 dollars and up a month for hosting :)
It's hard to come up with a good solution as long as you're not clear on the problem.
If I were in your position, I would first have a sincere discussion with him to uncover the real reason behind his behavior. Make sure you don't go into the conversation with an accusatory tone. Ask questions, listen, and try to emphasize.
Once you have a clear idea of what's holding him back, I'm sure the solution will be much more clear to you.
As a side note, I don't believe in convincing someone to get excited about an idea. If you're right and the reason is that he's simply not excited about the idea as much as you are, he's probably not the right co-founder for his specific venture.
Best of luck and happy new year!
Really appreciate this thoughtful advice, Karim. Super helpful. The thing is we already discussed multiple times who does what and I haven't been able to uncover his underlying motivation.
Do you think I should request a meeting where I obviously tell him the purpose of the meeting will be about discussing motivation/deliverables?
Agreed that he's probably not the right co-founder if he isn't excited. The thing is we complement each other so perfectly in terms of skills and ideas.
I think being very clear about your concerns with your potential co-founder is crucial here. Don't beat around the bush.
Co-founder conflicts are nasty and are often a result of unresolved early issues.
In my opinion, building and growing early-stage startups is less about skills and much more about grit and perseverance, (except for deep tech startups which require all of the above). Of course, you need to have the necessary level of skills to be able to build your product.
Btw, are you the technical co-founder?
I'd personally rather be a solo founder for a while than be with the wrong co-founder.
I am the technical cofounder. Lot of helpful insights here. Many thanks, Karim.
You're very welcome! Best of luck :D
I can relate to this. I used to try to motivate my co-founders, inspire them etc. It often works, but it's temporary. If you continue doing that it becomes your work to not only motivate and to stay positive yourself, but also do that for other people.
I found this was tiring and not a sustainable thing to do. You wan't a co-founder with who you can motivate and inspire each other, especially when the going gets tough.
I prefer to do things solo to having a co-founder who I have to constantly motivate.
Have an honest conversation with your co-founder, see how he feels. If nothing changes -- break up.
This is so helpful, really appreciate it. How was the break-up? Did you have to go through some tough moments? How did you communicate?
Agree with the other comments here, with the caveat that there's no harm in trying to talk it out first, as tkar suggested. Instead of guessing at your co-founder's feelings or troubles, address the problem you see frankly and see how he weighs in. But in the end, no matter what he's saying, it's output and actions that matter the most. Trust your gut and do what's best for moving forward, even if it feels scary in the moment (like not having a co-founder anymore).
Struggling with my co-founder as well. I get a load of things out of him and then radio silence, finding it really hard to work with him at the moment...
Can totally relate, it sucks. Especially the radio silence... Do you also think it's time to file a divorce for us? Reading all the comments here I feel I have no other choice. Everyone's situation is different, though.
So the day after I wrote this I had a really good call with him and things seem to be back on track. I couldn't do the project I'm doing without him so it would be super hard to "divorce" in our case
I believe it's a leadership skill to create a shared goal. It matters most when you want to turn your team into partners.
You should create a vision and mission for your startup and find a co-founder who shares those with you. Someone who's willing to sacrifice things, if necessary, as you are.
I tried jotting down vision & mission things, Noosh. I think the trouble is you forget those big picture things while dealing with tons of day-to-day stuff. You start caring about what work gets done and is delivered. Any advice on how to actually make use of them?
You're right, it's easy to forget the goals and get lost in a ton of daily tasks. I suggest setting and tracking OKRs to keep up with your goals.
Break down your goals into 1 year (What you want and can achieve in the next 1 year). Then break it into 3 months (What you're going to achieve in the next 3 months). Then break it into 1 month (What you're going to do in the next month). And finally, break it into weeks (what you're going to do in the following week).
Set weekly meetings to plan and organize the following week and review the past week.
The agenda of this meeting can be something like this:
I’ve had this problem on multiple previous projects, both from my cofounder being unmotivated and me being unmotivated relative to my cofounder. I think it’s a good sign either the business isn’t a good idea or the match with your cofounder isn’t a match.
Better to figure it out early then to get too far in and have a more serious and difficult problem.
This is basically already dead. Split while you can still do it clean. If you need to motivate your co-founders you are in the wrong business together.
Yeah, guess it's obvious by now. Any advice on how to actually do the breakup discussion?
Yes - I've done this twice. Best way is to not postpone it any longer. Go for a drink or give them a call and tell them directly and professionally why it is not going to work - make the decision and then look for a clean exit for both.
I think you can’t do it. I think you should find a person who shares the same interets as you or you find someone and then you 2 find mutual idea to work on
But even then someone will lose interest after few months especially if there no users or andy significant progress
Would you part ways immediately? The thing is we are making progress.
I would do that. It takes energy to keep yourself motivated and then extra energy to motivate another person. If that person cannot be motivated by the product, work and progress then maybe it's over and it's not worth it to go further
I agree with the other comments here: start divorce proceedings.
If your cofounder pushes back and says he still wants to make a go of it, you're then in a strong position to lay out what he has to do.
Make him prove his commitment.
Thanks, Mark. I think what I'm struggling with is how to actually start divorce proceedings? What language shall I use?
Yes, it's hard. It's best to be direct. You already know the words - you wrote them above - you just have to say them:
"I feel like you're not committed. You promise stuff but then you don't deliver. I think you're not excited about this project as much as I am and you don't see the potential."
I know how hard it is to tell someone something they don't want to hear. But your cofounder needs to hear it, and you both need to find a way forward, and after you address the issues, you'll both feel better about it.
Good luck!
Co founders are like a marriage. Some should end in divorce.
Perfectly said.
Wow that’s challenging.
I would 1) have a talk about what we both want short & long term regarding your project and beyond. And 2) based on what you both want, define next steps … i.e. redistribution of responsibilities/deliverables short-term to roles in the venture long-term.
It’s not easy to break up, but frequently it’s really for the best.
What I know and have seen with my algorithm is that frequently people go into business together because they like each other and have experiences and tastes in common. However, the attributes that are needed for smooth collaboration are not assessed (or even know to being with).
Good luck and reach out in case I can help you with anything.