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23 Comments

What are your secrets for balancing life, family, and work?

I'm wondering what you guys do to make sure that all of the important parts of your life get enough attention. A lot of people say that it's nearly impossible to have a family with young kids and start a business. I disagree! Tell me why you disagree too and what you're doing to make your goals happen (both business and family).

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    I'm 46, married with a wife and two teenage children and a full time job. Plus a house, yard, cars etc... to keep up. Plus hobbies. :-)

    I think you just have to accept that your progress will be slower, but it can be done. My goal this year is to just carve out like an hour a day to keep making progress. And then work on spikes on the weekend if I have time.

    Also, my kids are at the age now were I am actually starting to get them involved a little which is awesome: since I'm doing a game they can help me test it, their feedback is brutally honest, it gives me a chance to connect with them and work on the product at the same time it is a great learning opportunity for them!

    I just got my daughter going on freeCodeCamp and my son likes making YouTube videos so I'm going have him help me make a couple of videos.

    I'm finding that involving family and friends in the project really makes it makes a huge difference.

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      I feel like this will be me in about 6 years :)

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        Yea, the time goes so fast!

        Strangely, I don't really feel like I'm 46. I'm kind of like a big kid I guess. Maybe because I still enjoy a lot of the same things? Or maybe because I still like to try new things all the time.

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          There's no shame in it. It's just our generation I think. We grew up playing computer games and now we can do it with our kids 😁

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            Yea, that is kind of interesting how that worked out. My dad didn't get video games, like, at all when I was a kid.

            Totally different situation now with my kids. My kids were still small enough to sit on my lap when I first had them try the alpha release of some weird new game called Minecraft. :-)

            I do try hard to balance it out though. I love the outdoors too and try to get my kids outside as much as possible. Hiking, backpacking, camping, biking, kayaking, et...

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              I know right. My 5 year old plays Minecraft on hard mode survival these days. He's asking me to play right now.

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                My brother lives in California and I live in Wisconsin so my kids have probably spent more time with their cousin in Minecraft than real life. 8-0

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      Keeping up with everything is the hardest part for me as well. I think it's awesome that you're getting your kids involved and helping them with coding and making videos! My kids are still pretty young (6, 4 and 2) so they still don't really understand what daddy does for work :D

      Thanks for your advice though. Accepting that progress will be slower is a tough pill to swallow, especially when you think about all of the free time you used to have when you were younger. But I think that making realistic goals is probably the only way to keep the motivation going!

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        I've been thinking about this a lot the last couple of weeks and I did realize one huge advantage to my situation I never considered before....

        Even though having such small blocks of time to work on my product is frustrating, there is a silver lining. For me, the silver lining is that I can work on my product pretty much indefinitely. I don't have the pressure of running out of money if I don't start pulling in revenue right away because I have a day job.

  2. 3

    I'm 38, have 3 kids, a full time job and some side projects. It is possible to do business with kids and family.

    Some thoughts:

    • I spend every day at least 30mins on your project. Usually after the kids went to sleep. Continuous progress is much better than big burst every weekend or so.
    • I write down all the tasks I think I need to do for a project. Also I try to estimate them and plan ahead. I usually assign story points to my tasks. 1SP = 1 hour, 2=one evening,3=two evenings,5= probably the whole weekend, 8SP=probably 4 days.
    • I accept the fact that I'm tired sometimes after a long day.
    • I celebrate small project achievements together with my family. We usually go out hiking or play with some games.
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      I like the idea of continuous progress over a big burst every weekend or so. I’ve started using my lunch breaks. Drive a short distance to a parking lot with a nice view if possible, fire up the laptop and get some small things done. I’m able to do this almost every day. It builds momentum so you stay engaged.
      “Accept the fact that I’m tired sometimes after a long day” this. Being realistic and not beating yourself up helps keep you positive, which helps with creativity.
      Thanks for sharing!

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      Great points!! I love the idea of celebrating wins with the family. It ties your work back with why you do it and who you do it for :)

      What do you use to manage your own projects? (In terms of software etc). Also, what is your side project?

      Thanks for sharing!

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      I especially like the point about making steady progress. My biggest issue is that I tend to get super obsessed for a couple of weeks and then burn out for like months. My goal this year is to try to make steady progress as I'm sure my net progress will be much better.

      Plus, steady progress keeps people following your progress interested, which is critical.

  3. 3

    I'm 27 and am trying to create successful online biz NOW because I know I'm totally screwed once I have a wife and kids one day. I barely have enough time and energy as is with a full-time job + side hustle, but I know there are people out there who manage to do it all with a family, and I applaud you. Please, you superhumans out there, share your tips.

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      It is definitely something I regret not focusing on before marriage and kids. Although I also don't have the skills and knowledge that I have now. Good on you for hustling now!! Just curious, what is your side project?

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    I turn 40 this year and I've got a wife and 3 boys (aged 10, 7 and 5). For the last 5 years or so I've been working on side projects mostly after the kids go to bed.

    Most of that that time was spent working on an open source project. The good news is that I learned a lot about working on side projects while having a family. The bad news is that it didn't translate into a lot of revenue.

    This year I'm trying something different. I already know that I can put enough time and effort into a project to make something awesome. My goal now is to turn my hobby into a proper side hustle.

    My tips include:

    1. Get better at time management. When we're younger we tend to squander our time away. Watching TV, playing video games, drinking and so on. To be honest, I still do all of these things but I am much better at allocating some time to focus on side projects. I aim for 2 or 3 hours every night but in reality some nights are taken up by other things, etc. Even so, those hours add up if you're consistent with it.

    2. The time between working on the side project should not be underestimated. Use your lunch break, time on the train, standing in line, having a shower or whatever to think about what you're going to do next. If you can, write things down and make to-do lists. Use apps if they help. Getting organized this way really helps to focus those few hours at night.

    3. Be careful not to get trapped into busy work. Use the 80 / 20 rule a lot. 80% of your productivity comes from 20% of the work. It's very easy to find yourself working on things that don't really matter that much. This will be different for everyone, but keep it in mind.

    It can be amazing how much you can achieve in a small amount of time with a little practice. Once you get into this mindset you'll start noticing how much time most people waste.

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      Mindset is everything! Thanks for you tips, they are really great! I think it's a tough adjustment for a lot of people after you have kids when it comes to time management. Me and my wife have a nightly routine now with our 3 kids (6, 4, and 2) and it has been a life saver! I've definitely got to start applying the same principles to my work and side projects.

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        Routine really helps. Xmas is really difficult because the routine goes out the window while the kids are on holidays and we're all sitting up late and having guests over. Still, this is a good time to reflect on your year and make fresh plans for the next. New year's resolutions ftw.

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    I am 36 with a 2.5 year old and a 3 month old. The last 3 months, with the arrival of the new baby, I have almost done zero work on my side hustles. But I expect things to settle down a bit here in a little while. My strategy with my first child is a little different than what others have described.

    • I try my best to keep all side hustles work till after the kids go to bed, but that isn’t always possible. As with anything, things come up and I have to be able to adapt. But when I am with my family I make sure I am with the family.
    • One other thing that I didn’t see mentioned, is the importance of alone time with your significant other, even if it just sitting with each other watching TV. After the kids go to bed you need to balance both wife and side hustles. I try to spend 3 nights a week with my wife and 4 on my side hustle.
    • Stay organized! I use ClickUp, a task management tool for all of my side hustles and I find it extremely important to organize your tasks and thoughts and plan things out appropriately so you can maximize your productive time.
    • I also use ClickUp as a quick way to record a thought or a possible task. Most of my good thoughts come to me while I am away for my computer so I make sure I have a quick way to record what Is on my mind so I can clear it out of my head and get back to my family time.
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    I am 39 with two children under 5. I work full time during the week, I work on my side projects on weekday nights when the rest of the family is sleeping. I do not do any work when the children are awake as that is our time to spend together. Whether I can make a business out of it who knows but I enjoy it as although it has similarities to my day job it is a very different aspect.

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      I try to hold by this value as well! No work while the kids are up. How many hours (or minutes) per day would you say you can dedicate to side projects? Also, just curious what projects you have on the go?

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    As of now, I am way too busy growing and working on Howuku while maintaining a full-time job to support myself. Dedicating all my hours to work while trying to squeeze out some time for friend and family whenever possible.

    For me, it's really tough and almost impossible to have a balance between family and work. I give myself 2 more years to grow https://howuku.com to a sizable revenue (hopefully) before settling down with my girlfriend and starting a family together.

    I couldn't imagine starting a family right now at this point of time.

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      Time management becomes so much more important when you have a family. Good on you for hustling now! Also, awesome product! What sort of things are you doing to promote/sell it?

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